Tuesday, April 29, 2014

30 Reasons Why I Love My Husband So Very Much!

I met my husband 8 years ago, and it was actually only about a month before his 22nd Birthday. He invited me to his party, but I couldn't go because this is when my mama just had her back surgery, so I needed to be with my family. Tom and I flirted in those days via text messages and...wait for it...MySpace!!! Lol!!! On MySpace, Tom expressed how bummed he was that I couldn't come to his party; I said that he needed to have a drink for me; and he said, "There will be several drinks to Amy!" Haha, I thought this was so cute! Aww I miss the early flirtation days! Anyway! A couple of weeks after his birthday, we were officially boyfriend and girlfriend! Tomorrow, he turns the big 3 & O, and I'm so happy my husband will finally be joining me in this 30's decade of life haha!

My plans for celebrating this significant birthday are, in my opinion, quite excellent! Tom has no enthusiasm for birthdays, but I love them! So even though he's all, "it's no big deal," about it, I am very excited! And, I love my husband so much that I know I can list 30 reasons why and therefore how grateful I am that he was born. Here goes!

I love my husband so very much, and I'm so grateful he was born because:

1. He was and is the best flirt I've ever known...the butterflies I still get are amazing!

2. When we were dating, on a camping trip, he gathered me in his arms and asked, "Will you be my girlfriend?" Oh yes I will!

3. His eyes were the biggest and bluest when he first said, "I think I love you. I know I love you." It was on grandma's front porch and I think I probably could have kissed him forever in that moment.

4. I remember the shirt he was wearing on our first kinda date/ group date...pale pink striped button up...we had our first kiss and couldn't stop kissing!

5. We use to say, "I love you tons and tons," and we still sometimes say it or we'll use other measurements to express it because we're cheesy lol!

6. The first time he asked me to marry him was only 3 months after we started dating! It actually took four and a half years before we did get married, but I love that he never gave up on me.

7. Our friends and family say that sometimes he looks like Tobey Maguire or Daniel Radcliffe...but...

8. His lips are so much nicer than these actors...I love his lips!

9. Tom has a nice butt. He'll be so embarrassed, but it's true...I love his badonkadonk lol!

10. He can't do accents except for one that kinda sounds Indian like Apu from the Simpsons. And if he tries other accents, they always end up sounding like Apu's! Oh! But he can do a pretty good exaggerated southern accent too!

11. When he's hyper, he'll randomly bust out in some crazy dances...I'm determined to get them on video some day!

12. He forgives me when I act like a total bitch towards him...and I always feel badly when I do!

13. I love his chin...I can't exactly explain why...I just do.

14. He looks really great with a goatee...can't wait till he's out of the Navy and can grow one again!

15. I'm proud he joined the Navy at 26 years old. He didn't like the jobs he kept working and so he did something about it.

16. Wives claim this all the time, but it's so very true here. He is so very smart! And y'all can trust me on this because ignorant people annoy the hell outta me!

17. I love the stories his mama tells me about when he was a little boy. He was so smart and therefore a trouble maker and smart ass...God Bless his mama for raising a little punk kid in to the amazing man he is! Love you, Joyce!

18. He makes me laugh :)

19. His predictive texts gone wrong are so incredibly hilarious!

20. He calms me down...all he has to do is put his arms around me when I'm terribly upset.

21. He loves the outdoors like I do!

22. His patience is like a gift from God!

23. He's always surprising me with "just because" flowers...oh how I love just because flowers!

24. When he decides to do a little house work of his own freewill...le sigh...

25. He always picks out the best gifts for me! Seriously! I have such a wide range of things I like, and he always gives me something that appeals to every single one of them!

26. He doesn't mind my snoring lol!

27. I'm so grateful for his hard work and that he provides for our little family!

28. He loves our dog, Kakashi...and I love it when he wrestles with him...it's a hoot!

29. Whenever we go through hard times in our relationship, he works at it and we work together to get through the obstacles...and we're stronger every time.

30. I love that 8 years ago, Tommy fell in love with me and has kept on loving me all this time. He has been such an important part of the woman I've become, and I don't know what I'd do without him.

Tommy, I'm so grateful you were born! So grateful you are a part of my life! I love the laughter and silliness in our relationship. I love you tons and tons ;)

Always making goofy faces

Our 3 year Wedding Anniversary

Thank you, dear ones, for indulging me in my proclamation of love for my husband...y'all are the best! Hugs and love, my lovelies!

The Super Grateful and Crazy Wife of Tom,
p.s. I apologize for the large amount of "haha's"...it happens though...haha! Ha!

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Pretty Much My Favorite Breakfast...or Lunch...or Dinner...

Good morning, dear ones! I thought I'd share my favorite little dish I prepare at home for the morning time...and sometimes afternoon time...also evening time...

Everyone knows that breakfast is appropriate for all hours of the day...so ha!

This came from a Doctor Oz episode. I wasn't going to link it, but I guess I should...here you go...right HERE...it's actually a pretty good little 3 day diet. Y'all can decide on that...I'm here to discuss the beauty of the Tex Mex Egg and Cheese Muffin. I just call it deliciousness!

All you need is:
whole wheat English muffin
1 egg
olive oil
Swiss cheese

I use a small ramekin to cook my egg in the microwave...less mess and it's the perfect size for the whole wheat muffin. Here we go! I always start with toasting the muffin for a couple of minutes while I get the egg ready, but you can toast your muffin whenever you want...there's no judgement here! Next, pour a small amount of olive oil in to the ramekin and use your fingers to spread it around the dish. Crack the egg and throw it in there! Give it a little beating with a fork and pop it in the microwave for 20 seconds. Remove the dish and add the Swiss cheese.

Pop it back in the microwave for another 20 seconds. After that, I scoop the egg out with a spoon and plop it on my English muffin...then I add a little salsa...like a teaspoon and a half...however much you prefer. Oh and I use hot salsa...'cause I like my life to be a little spicy! Then I drizzle a little more olive oil on top of that.

A little side not for y'all...these pics are really not the greatest, and I apologize for that. But! I was really hungry (on the verge of hangry) and thus did not take the time with finding a good place with natural light to photograph the process...please forgive me...move along...and eat this delicious concoction!

Moving on! Dr. Oz calls for 2 slices of avocado on his version, but I always use a half of an avocado. Avocados are remarkable delightful yummy little green things, so therefore I don't feel bad going a little overboard. So, I scoop out half of an avocado and place it on the muffin topper...then I take a fork to mush it all up, so I don't have to worry about chunks slipping out all over the place.

Side note: My friend, Karla, was the one who suggested I mush it up to diminish the messiness...I felt like an airhead...but that's okay sometimes...thanks so much, Karla!

Just flip the top over on the bottom...because that's the order of things right here...and you have a magnificent little breakfast muffin! I love it!

I plan on using egg whites only when I get the chance to fix it up without feeling hangry about the situation haha! But obviously, there's plenty of room for changes here. For example; I added salt and pepper for my grandma when I made it for her because she likes her food with salt and pepper...simple as that!

Anywho! I realize I'm posting this at lunch time, but that's okay because, like I said...breakfast, lunch, or dinner...there are no rules on food 'round here now!

Hope you all are having a wonderful weekend! Hugs and love, my lovelies!

Amy the wanna be chef ;)

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

The Toughest Grandma in the World...and a message from her too!

I drove 1,404 miles from Virginia Beach, Virginia to Norman, Oklahoma to see my grandma. She had been in remission of stage 4 inflammatory carcinoma breast cancer for a few years but was recently diagnosed with lung cancer. Grandma’s been battling it, true to her feisty spirit, but the cancer had teamed up with the escalating damage of emphysema, and it had gotten to the point where I finally said, “I need to go home.” My husband understood of course, and thankfully, my employer showed compassion as well. Grandma asked me why I had come, and I said, “To spend time with you before you get any sicker.” She nodded and simply said okay. I’ve been here a few hours short of a week now, and every moment with her has been precious and cherished.

She’s doing okay right now, and I’m optimistic she can get stronger. But it will be a tough journey…she really can’t exert herself at all without struggling for breath. The oxygen helps, but the emphysema cannot be reversed. She still tries to do it all herself when she feels like she has the energy. I catch her and listen to her breath become labored and finally ask her, “Why are you doing all of this when I’m here? Sit down, woman!” There’s always a chuckle, but luckily she listens to me and happily lets me do the moving, grabbing, bringing, taking, and so on for her.

Our family comes to check on her every day, and they’ve been taking care of her meals and doctor visits and such…it’s definitely a group effort. But, I really like being available for her 24/7, and it’s going to be hard to leave her when I have to go home. Grandma has said she doesn’t want me to leave; of course she knows I’ll have to eventually; so I just say, “Let’s not think about it right now.”

I recorded some videos of her telling stories, and will be taking lots of pictures, as we photographers tend to do! I’m hoping I can talk her in to letting me get a wheel chair and taking her to the art museum while I’m here…I think I can be persuasive haha! I just want to bring some fun to her so that she’s not just sitting and reading all the time…not that there’s anything wrong with that…but I want to make just a few more lovely memories with her right now. Maybe she can beat this…she’s determined and her attitude is encouraging…maybe this is just another struggle that my tough, feisty, and stubborn grandma will bravely conquer. She inspires me and strengthens me…If there is a person to truly believe in and root for…she’s my grandma.

Here’s a message from her to our family and friends who’ve been raising prayers, sending good vibes, and sharing love. Thank you so much for the support and encouragement you’ve all expressed…it truly means the world to my family, grandma, and me!

 (Had to upload video via YouTube. Hopefully it works! I will also upload her stories there at some point as well, but I will share them on here to let y'all know.)

*Update* I'm back in Virginia now, and although I loved the 3 weeks with my grandma, it just wasn't long enough. And the truth is...I don't think any amount of time with her could ever be long enough...I'll always want another story, another hug, another laugh...but let's not think about that right now! It was a wonderful visit with her. I took her to get her hair cut and to try a latte at Daylight Donuts; we had a couple of trips to the grocery store; we had a couple of trips to the doctor's office; we had a lesson on her egg noodles our family adores; we had moments of silence where we both read or napped...it was simply just a time for us to be together.

She was doing well at first. After chemo, she gradually got weaker and sadder, but then bounced back after that. Then her feet and ankles became so swollen it hurt to walk...a trip to the doctor, order to cut back on sodium, and a prescription of Lasiks took care of that. However, she was not drinking enough water and therefore became dehydrated and weak. I rallied the family to help persist that she drink more water. These were my last days with her before I left, and our family has shared with me that she's staying hydrated and getting better now. It was an emotional time with her...being with her through the ups and downs of all that comes with lung cancer, emphysema, and the side effects that come with the medicines and treatments. I did not want to leave. I held her hand and told her several times in those last moment, "Call me if you need me to come back. Call me if you want me to come back. There will be no problem...I will come back no matter what." My sister and my mama assured me that they would be with her all the time like I had been those weeks...I cried and cried and didn't want to say goodbye. I hugged Grandma over and over...it was a struggle to let go of her.

I don't know what condition she'll be in next time I see her. I pray that she wins this fight like the many fights she has won before. But, I also know she is ready for whatever may happen next. I'm grateful I got to spend so much time with her...grateful for the videos and photos I captured...grateful for her stories...grateful for her stubborn ways...

I love you so very very very much, Grandma!

Cherish your time with those you love, my dears. Hugs and love, my lovelies!


Wednesday, April 9, 2014

Any Compassionate & Decent Doctors Out There!?

Doctors don't want to treat addicts anymore. That seems to be the most common response anyway. And you know what...that really really...REALLY pisses me off! This whole "pain pills dependency epidemic" was created by doctors, right? Their patients continued to complain about pain, and their response was to just give out the pills! And now, they don't even want to care for those patients with those addictions anymore! There are so many policies and guidelines in place now (that should have been present before) that really keep the doctors liable...penalties are dealt left and right, and they're so afraid of messing up that they're just throwing up their hands and saying, "I won't treat addicts!" Of course, I'm not trying to say that this is the only reason or explanation...but there's no doubt that it did happen in several cases. The assumption appears to be that if an addict is seeking a doctor, they're only actually seeking the pills. But what about the addicts who are on a pain management program? They are taking care of their addiction and pain with other facilities, but they need other doctors for colds, infections, and so many other illnesses that we all deal with whether we're dependent on pain medicine or not! Seriously!

I will say that the majority of statements I read on social networking sites are simply judgmental. Some people do take advantage of programs, and some people are really just looking to get high. But who the hell decided that the actions of a few people should define the other millions looking for a compassionate and decent doctor? Rage...this causes me to feel rage!

The point of all this is very simple. I need a primary care doctor to see one of my family members. This family member manages the pain and addiction...the program that helps this family member with the pain and addiction can not help with the medical needs that are needed...the symptoms could be a result of the pain management treatment or not. Regardless...this person deserves to be seen and cared for without judgment or prejudice.

I am SO SICK of the judgment and prejudice in this country. Come on people! Stop defining everybody and  everything on the actions of a few! If you know a primary care doctor that will take care of my family member, I would very much appreciate the help! Needed in Norman, OK.

*update* Called 5 doctors this morning. One wasn't accepting new patients, and I left messages with the nurses of the other 4. Two called me back. I missed one of the calls, but the voicemail didn't sound very friendly. The nurse I did talk to, Nola, knew exactly where I was coming from and understood how badly my family member had been treated in the past. I will share this doctor's name and contact info after her appointment if I think he's going to take good care of my family. Fingers crossed! Prayers up!

Dear ones, I'll definitely be ranting a little bit more on this blog...however, it will be from a place in my heart...which does not judge, strives for peace, and only wants the best for humanity. Hugs and love, my lovelies!

Ro Fo Sho out! ;)

Monday, April 7, 2014

Another Update...Because That's Just What I Do! Ha!

My lovely dears, it’s time for another depression update! Here’s a short summary in list form…because lists are cool.

Was doing really really well.
Triggers sent me falling back down.
Struggled and coped badly.
Got worse.
Got irritated with myself.
Remembered how great it was to feel the way I did before.
Back on track.
Getting better.
Seeing that happy light again.

It sounds so simple in list form, doesn’t it? All of us who struggle with mental illnesses know that the word “simple” will never be used to describe the fights we battle! The little side notes to my list would include damaging relationships, drinking excessively, making bad decisions, eating through sadness, and so on and so on. But you want to know what I realized through this last bumpy ride off the tracks? Of course you do! I have been dealing with depression (as far back as I can remember anyway) for exactly half of my life thus far. What? Seriously? Half my life. It shocked me. My own electrotherapy we could say…hahaha…not really.

So! I can’t even count the number of times I’ve fallen all the way down to the belly of the beast. I’ve lost track of how often I’ve had to find my way (with the help of friends, family, doctors, medicines, and self reflection) through the dark and back to the light. The number I know is 16 years…half of my life.

My psychiatrist recently told me I’m actually in a really great place of self awareness. I know how happy I was feeling, and I miss it. The extreme switch from doing really well to doing really badly, gave me a side by side comparison. The sharp and abrupt fall down, as opposed to the typical gradual decrease, was cold water to my sleeping face. I’m awake now; determined as I found myself to be before; and actually a little pissed off. I’d say that’s great motivation!

How are your journeys going? Are you making a genuine effort to take control of your illnesses? Remember that healing can start from just opening the curtains, walking to the mailbox, making silly faces in the mirror…just doing something that brings a little light, gives a little fresh air, or causes a little laugh (just to name a few) can start a domino effect of other little things that can start to bring some relief closer to you and darkness further behind you.

Stay determined. Hugs and love, my lovelies!
Amy (The Ro Fo Sho kicking depression’s ugly butt!)