Wednesday, June 3, 2015

Blooming and Busy

Hi there, my lovelies! I've tried to write a few times this last month and a half, but I just couldn't ever get the words out like I wanted. It's been another long up, down, sideways, and upside down on the bad roller coaster ride! Below is a little something I started writing about two and a half weeks ago that I wanted to make sure I share...

Hello, dear readers, how have y'all been? It's been more than a month since I wrote last and I'm terribly sorry for that, but it's been a difficult time as I'm sure y'all have imagined with all that I've been sharing about my struggles recently with depression. Ain't it a bitch, right? Let's be real, my friends! If I could pick one word for this last month, a word of the day of sorts for the last several days, it would be heavy. The fight, my eyelids, basic functioning...heavy...a pressing weight. Every thing I do is with a push; I'm shoving against a massive presence that would rather keep me on my ass. It takes so much energy to get from the start of the day to the end of the makes me just want to sleep...sleep and sleep and sleep until I wake up and have been magically healed and revived!
(written May 11th)

I'm happy to report that the weight has lifted quite a bit...the heavy presence has eased. I'm doing better...but every day is still a fight, and it's not an easy one just yet. And yes, it does get easier...there will come a time when I will almost forget about the shadow of depression that always follows me...I'll be blogging one day, and it will occur to me that, "huh...I can't remember my last bad day." It will be a big boost...another "high on life" wave to ride, and I can't wait! Time...everything takes time...I'm just trying to be patient and stay optimistic as I battle through each day.

I've missed writing, however, and I realize that I need to make more of an effort to stay consistent with this blog. But I've been busy! Friends have been visiting every weekend for the past month and a half, and today I started my new job! So here's what I'm thinking about as I share the latest and greatest with y'all haha...this is a blooming and busy time during my journey. Buds were bursting into beautiful blooms around me each day, and they became symbolic to me. I watched them during their stages and transformations...wondering, "what will this one look like." I took photographs of them at each new development, and I made little collages for Instagram showing their progress. As the petals uncurled and soaked up the sun, I was also blooming, and the sun was giving life to me as well! I am healing...

 Friends visiting and socializing, preparing for my new job as a photographer, and now training for this job have kept me busy. The truth is I haven't been managing my time very well either! Whoops. Ok! So! Time to get my groove back! I have photos to share with you and paintings I've done and poems I've written...I'm looking forward to showing more of the art and creative side of this blog; excited to bring a little sunshine to this little corner of the Internet! For now I'll wrap with the obvious words for the day (and most recent days)...Blooming and Busy!

Hugs and love, my lovelies!
Been missin' y'all!
Amy Ro Fo Sho!!!

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